Damn.. I NEED A BOYFRIEND

Recently, I've been approach -i guess- by totally unwelcome male. These makes me realize that i need a boyfriend for back-up. its sound unpleasant but it is the truth.. It is not my intention of use the guy for my convenience but I also felt that it is the time for me to settled down.. Well, i'm already 23 right, what am I waiting for? the problem is, why did the guy I like did not like me back and why did the guy I do not like approached me. is it my doing or is it just the twist of fate. I'm really sick of it. Seriously.

recently, being re-reading a few of novel that have been read before. somehow kind of miss the books and characters. mostly missed was Julie Garwood's. then, twilight just pop up in mind. its been a while i didn't 'met' Edward, and of course the most adorable vampire, The Cullens. so, this upcoming holiday, I'll want to 'see' Edward again. hahaha...

which was it?

am i wrong for do not want to walk the familiar path? well, honestly i didn't think it's wrong. i want to walk the path that less traveled by other because of i believe the path would lead to the warmer breeze and lighter path. it is what i believe. i may not know what held by tomorrow but i know that taking this turn will lessen the burden of the future hold for me. i may not know where would my destination is, but the new breeze and light will lessen the headache.

beliefs and views

I've read someone wrote that respect was earned, not demanded, but dignity was taught by example. how is it we wanted to earned the respect. when the servants are obedient, are we earned respect from them? how would we know if we demanded the respect not earned the respect? and it is said that dignity is taught by example. how it is be done? can we copy the dignity from the example?

first entries

july 27th 2010...

the weather is good.. its hot but still a good weather..
i wanted a space of my own. a bigger space.. I'm drowning in the hot sunlight. why the stress did not go away. i don't need you, so, can you leave me alone. but you would not listen. you're stubbornness really getting into my skin. but it's OK, I'll get to you one day. I'm going to fight this battle you started.